John David Washington stars in Christopher Nolan's forthcoming film Tenet.

NEW BRAUNFELS, Texas—The biggest irony in this summer's cinematic saga over Tenet—director Christopher Nolan's latest heady time travel detective movie that he and his studio insist must play in The Theater™ despite a worldwide pandemic—is that the film itself will inevitably get lost. Whatever performances, ideas, and dazzling set pieces Nolan manages to imbue into this film have and will become secondary to the bigger industry struggles. What does reopening theaters safely look like? Is it too soon to do so? Does limiting the release of such a high profile film to theaters become unethical if it puts viewers at risk? And if the bottom line continues to motivate all this, does pivoting to VOD-first, even temporarily in the midst of unprecedented health challenges, mean eventually transitioning to that model (and its potentially smaller revenue ceiling) forever?

All that stuff sat on my mind when I received two emails last month. The first, on August 11, seemed to be testing the water. "How do you feel about attending a 'press only' (no guests) in a playdate theater, where there will be social distancing and face masks required?"

My response: lol, no. Even movie theaters boasting HEPA Filter Vacuums and 25 percent capacity run directly in conflict with World Health Organization advice that suggests the best way to minimize COVID-19 risk is to avoid the Three Cs: crowded places, close-contact settings, and confined or enclosed spaces. The Texas Medical Association placed "going to the movies" near the top of its COVID-19 risk scale alongside experiences like "going to a theme park," "eating at a buffet," and "attending religious service with 500+ patrons." If you haven't read the news in the US lately, it remains not good: we're about to surpass 200,000 COVID-19 deaths in the very near future as communities grapple with things like school re-opening, football season, and in-person voting.

In that light, the email on August 28 seemed downright silly based solely on the subject line: "URGENT! TENET SCREENING." In good faith—as a person with a family who reads scientific coverage on Ars Technica—I could not justify the risk to see a film early and review it for an audience who largely can't see it anyway. Though it has already been screening for the rest of the world, Tenet opened in the US over Labor Day Weekend, with Nolan and Sony Pictures insisting it would only appear in theaters, which are very much not open nationwide. Those parameters did have one small technicality working in my favor, though: two weeks before its release, Sony announced Tenet would also be playing a limited number of outdoor theaters if that particular market had indoor theaters open to the public. And thanks to Austin's Alamo Drafthouse opening in late August for Bill & Ted Face The Music, the Stars & Stripes Drive-In 45 minutes south of town in New Braunfels suddenly became a safer option to see whether the film at the center of all this hoopla even merited talking about.

No spoilers to come, but I'll say this: Tenet won't save physical movie theaters, financially or culturally speaking. It is, however, a totally fun nearly two-and-a-half-hour thrill ride with some clever ideas that wouldn't necessarily make it past Neil deGrasse Tyson. In a vacuum, this film could have easily popped up mid-summer and taken over the pop culture zeitgeist in print and online, à la Once Upon A Time In Hollywood in 2019. In 2020, though, see it at a drive-in if you can—otherwise, waiting won't be the end of the world. There's no need to fly somewhere for a "safe" screening or drive four hours or cross state lines. Really.

  • The Stars & Stripes Drive-In has oodles and oodles of parking space—so much so they could require social distancing (one car every three spots or so). Combined with a Texas evening in the mid-to-low 80s, and this is as comfortable as movie watching in 2020 gets. Nathan Mattise
  • A neon oasis slightly off I-35 Nathan Mattise
  • You could even still pull into spots backwards and pop the hatch if you're so inclined. ("Mask required in shared areas" signage was also prominent, as was welcome signs in German since New Braunfels is an old Texas German town). Nathan Mattise
  • Am I driving into a Charlie Kaufman film, here? Nathan Mattise
  • Not a lot of social distancing, but thankfully plenty of masks at the '50s-style concessions stand. Nathan Mattise
  • Nolan sound editing ain't really conducive to FM audio, but I didn't really have problems.
  • Whatever happened here hasn't actually happened yet. YouTube/Warner Bros.
  • Michael Caine is a welcome addition to any film. YouTube/Warner Bros.
  • Hey, it's Kenneth Branagh! YouTube/Warner Bros.
  • Robert Pattinson driving backwards on a freeway. YouTube/Warner Bros.

Let John David Washington save the world all the time

Tenet is the kind of movie that leaves you asking, "Why can't we have John David Washington as James Bond?" Secret operations take place where the stakes involve the fate of all humanity. Good looking people in well-tailored suits get into occasional fist fights as they globetrot around to access person of interest after person of interest until reaching the big bad. Fixers play a substantial role, and each has an ambiguous initial backstory and motivation that our hero (literally named "Protagonist," says IMDB) slowly unravels. The full picture keeps changing. Stuff blows up, a lot, and looks really, really cool doing so.

But Tenet is not the newest Bond movie (No Time To Die still hasRead More – Source

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